Friday, April 17, 2026

Bring in the Cavalry – Enter Alex

 


After months of watching my garden slowly turn into a plant trauma ward, I finally did something drastic.I called for backup.Her name is Alex.She’s the new lady gardener who turned up the other evening, took one look at the battlefield (sorry, garden), and didn’t run away screaming. That alone makes her a hero in my book.While Tom is out there strimming things that don’t need strimming and offering solutions after the crime has already been committed, Alex is the complete opposite.She actually looks at plants before they’re half-dead.
She talks about soil, light, drainage, and proper timing (revolutionary concepts, I know).
She even said she can help with the re-wilding at the bottom of the garden — gradually, without turning it into another crime scene.
The survivors have already started whispering about her.Caroline the Cordyline perked up a tiny bit.
Briony the Peony straightened her remaining leaf.
Even Fatima the Fatsia looked slightly less collapsed.
I swear I heard a quiet chant from the border:
“Alex… Alex… Alex…”
Tom still does the lawns and hedges (for now), but the plants have made it very clear where their loyalties now lie.The Tom Survivors Support Group has officially upgraded to “The Alex Rescue Committee”.Welcome to the team, Alex.
Please save what’s left of us.
The end (until Alex comes back with her quote… and hopefully a plan to stop the carnage)One mouse you say? Okaaaay.

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